I was so hell-bent on self-destruction. I was not happy with the way my life was going. And I have saw it best fit just to wild out and party it all the way. So, yeah, I was not in a sane or happy place.
I woke up one morning and my parents told me I was going on a trip. And I instantly knew that was not good news because I was only getting in trouble at home. So, I fought my dad and he wrestled me into the car and they shipped me off over here. And I was very afraid, I was really so afraid on the drive up. And when I got here, I knew that I was going to feel at home.
And it took about a month and a half for me to finally see that I had better get it together. Because I was about to turn 18 and I was going to be grown up. And I couldn’t act like a kid anymore.
And at that point when I realized that I only had two weeks left here and I was terrified. So, I asked if I could stay until I felt ready and I stayed until I was 18 and went on to sober living after that.
I feel like the biggest change that occurred was I gained self-respect and the ability to make decisions that were positive for myself. I love myself really. That was the biggest thing I learned was how to love myself.
There was always someone here to question a thought that I said out loud or an action that I was [inaudible 00:01:40] and that didn’t really add up. And they wouldn’t tell me what I was doing was wrong, but they would ask me about it. And I realized that a lot of the things I thought and a lot of the things I did, I never really put much thought into. And when they really got me to start looking into my life and looking at why I was doing certain things, it enabled me to change my thought process.
What I was doing was not working, but I didn’t want to try anything else because it was scary. But if my parents didn’t send me here, I wouldn’t be here. I honestly think I would be dead or just on some downward spiral close to it.
So, I honestly…it’s a scary decision, it’s a big decision, but it’s an important decision that needed to be made.